Those who have been dumped and understand fully that their Ex’s had to walk away from the situation after probably several warnings of abuse or bad behavior will have to take some good quality time trying to work on SELF IMPROVEMENT or HABILITATION from the uncontrollable pattern that is harming their chances at love. There is no other recourse. They must work on this before starting a new relationship or suffer the same dysfunction and ultimately heartbreak.
For those who have been wrongfully dumped, romantic DISCONNECTION and REJECTION can take years to heal, even decades. This could be especially hard if you spent a great deal of time with your Ex up until the day of your breakup. Some experts say that you should spend time getting over your Ex before dating again.
Is your Ex waiting date other people to grieve loosing you?
ACCEPTANCE IS FIRST STEP TO HEALING! Accept the breakup. It’s over. Done. The movie ended, the credits have rolled, and the theatre just put all the lights back on. The ushers are already sweeping up the popcorn and Goobers off the floor and asking all of the stragglers to leave.
Accepting the end has come will put your head in another mindset. Etch it into your mind. IT’S REALLY OVER!
You won’t believe how fast you will forget about your Ex when you KNOW that.
You must know it and BELIEVE it to be true. If you don’t, you won’t get over your Ex.
DO NOT TRY TO GET BACK WITH YOUR EX! Believing that one day you’ll be back in each other’s arms is not something you want to hold on to. It will EXTEND YOUR PERIOD OF PAIN. Do you want to extend your period of pain? It’s important that you come to terms with reality. Your Ex made a decision about both of your lives and you must trust that true love would NEVER walk away from you. Is he or she confused? Are they just not seeing you for who you really are? THAT IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM if the person you were seeing faild to see your worth! Your mission is to trade your tears for happiness again, and it lies in your future.
Your most important step is to gain SELF-EMPOWERMENT and restoring your SELF WORTH that has been diminished from this experience. Fall in love with yourself, pamper yourself, and treat yourself well. Comedy shows are great entertainment to get your mind out of a funk. See them all! After a break-up it is good to learn a new hobby, take a new class, or get involved in a time consuming project. This will keep you busy so that can’t obsess about your Ex. This is your time to be selfish.
Talk to your support system of friends to give you some general reassuring VALIDATION. But don’t get to deep with them or allow them to give you too much advice. They are too close to you to help you achieve the kind of groundbreaking SELF-EMPOWERMENT that you need right now. You’ll also want to make it a rule that they are NOT ALLOWED TO BRING UP YOUR EX unless you initiate the conversation. This will help you deal with the loss better than to be reminded of it at times you’re actually feeling good about yourself again.
Seek a therapist or a counselor who is not personally involved so they can help you see how you came to this point in YOUR LIFE, not just about your breakup, because your breakup is only a tiny part of the big picture. They are exceptional for really letting you discover things about yourself that you never knew, which can help your future relationships.
DO NOT BASH YOUR EX publicly or even with your support system. Even though this seems like fun, try not do this because it is more damaging to you than anyone. You’ll find it puts you at a state of reliving your feeling of rejection perpetually while revealing an insecure exterior. It actually reverses the healing process.
Get your mind MENTALY FIT TO DATE AGAIN by reading “The Mental Preparation For Dating” section of this guide.
Getting back in the game again, will get you back on your feet, validate your desirability and keep you from thinking about your past.
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